5 Ways To Make Divorce Easier On The Kids

0 Comments 02 January 2012

 5 Ways To Make Divorce Easier On The Kids


Divorce is very difficult for a child, no matter what age they are. Even older kids need their parents to help them through this difficult time. No matter what the motive is for the divorce, there are a few things that you, as a parent, can do to make it easier for them.

1. Let them know it is not their fault

Most kids think that divorce is their fault at some point. Make sure you tell them it is not. Try to reason with them and tell them about the differences that separate your spouse and yourself. Make it very clear to them how they were not involved in the rift between you, and try to stress this point continually throughout the process, but in more subtle ways.

2. Don’t bad-mouth

The urge to vent is a realistic one. Just don’t vent to or in front of your kids. No matter what happened between you and your spouse personally, the kids still need to love and respect them. It is healthier for the kids and for you in the long run.

3. Cooperate

Even if you and your soon-to-be-ex do not get along, make an effort for the kids. Cooperation is one of the trademarks of an adult relationship. You do not have the indulgence of throwing fits or ignoring the other party. The kids belong to both of you; make an effort to work together for their sake.

 5 Ways To Make Divorce Easier On The Kids


4. Don’t make them choose sides

The kids love both of you. Do not make them choose which one they love more. Make sure that the kids know that they should never feel the need to take sides. Do not set them against your ex. They are children, not weapons.

5. Sustain relationships

Even if you do not have custody of the kids, remember to keep your relationship with them. Relationships take exertion and energy. Put forth that effort even if you don’t get to see your kids as often as you would like. A divorce is not justification to abandon your children. Here are some family bonding activities that will help you get closer to your kids.

There are many things that parents can do for their children in the event of a divorce, but these five are of the utmost importance. Every kid needs direction from their parents during this difficult time. Take the time to talk to your child and assure them that your love for them will not change due to the unfortunate circumstances. It is also important to always be approachable for when they need to talk about the situation, this may be helpful to everyone involved.

Nancy Parker was a professional nanny and enjoys writing about a wide range of subjects: health, parenting, child care, find a nanny tips etc. You can contact her @ nancy.parker015 @

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